Facebook - are we becoming less personal?

I had an short but interesting conversation with an old friend over the phone a couple of weeks ago. I called, among other things, to inquire about his new status as a Facebook user (at least new to me as I'd just come across it on my recommendations page). To be honest, I was surprised to see him as a user given his age (no I won't reveal it) but was pleased that he had decided to embrace social networking.

No chance.

Turns out he was encouraged to sign up by one of his friends, but his basic view was that he was too busy to be able to contribute meaningfully to the discussion and following their goings on and preferred to concentrate on a smaller circle of friends and communicate with them verbally.

That got me thinking about the real value of Facebook in everyday life. My kids each have a few HUNDRED friends on Facebook (which appears to be the norm these days) and are prolific posters as well, to the consternation (rightly) of my wife.

On reflection I agree and disagree with my friend at the same time.

Facebook does have its value as a tool to keep a large group of causal (and close) friends apprised of what we are thinking or feeling at particular moment. We all love to know what's going on with our circle of friends and to let them know what we are up to or happen to be thinking at any particular moment. On that level it's similar to this blog except that blogs are wide open to whoever is interested (which is the point), with the added dimension (or illusion?) of intimacy provided by a limited audience. Although I'm not sure that an audience of 500 can be seen as intimate anyway. As a tool for looking up old acquaintances it's great (except that that busy professionals simply have no time or inclination to participate in any form of social networking for its own sake). I've only managed to track down 1 (!) friend from the old days but only because he's a journalist with a web presence.

But can FB become a replacement for solid long term relationships? Can you really console someone or offer advice via FB? Can you share your problems this way? I don't know - maybe Gen Y can, but I prefer real social interaction to really build lasting relationships.